Part 1

DID SCHWICK EAT PUPPY? TWO BRAVE, (AND ONE NOT SO BRAVE) ADVENTURERS ATTEMPT TO DISCOVER THE ANSWER.



PART TWO of the 'WHERE'S PUPPY?' adventures.



Puppy Poo. How cute!


Before Toluca made her way to Bloodmyst Isle to speak to High Chief Stillpine, I visited my favourite toffee place in Theramore. I thought it was strange how people should leave toffees hanging around for anyone to take but I didn’t care as I needed to find my Puppy Poo. I figured that when Toluca spoke to High Chief Stillpine, he would be very very friendly to her, and it’s always nice and polite to take toffees and cookies as presents when visiting friends. Anyway, I tucked one toffee into each cheek and ran back very slowly (the toffees were rather heavy) to give one to Toluca, and one as a present for High Chief Stillpine. I tried not to drool too much on them but it was difficult because they were so tasty.


Free toffees!


Toluca was very grateful (how sweet! – sweetness and kindess runs in our family didn’t you know?), and, later on when she came back from her visit, she told me about her furbolg dialect conversation with him. He was gravely concerned about Puppy’s disappearance (and very very grateful for the toffee), and with sadness in his eyes, he’d explained to Toluca that it may be too late to rescue Puppy from his sad fate



High Chief Stillpine receives Toluca's toffees


My eyes widened as Toluca explained about the legendary dinosaur that roamed a far and distant place called Un’Goro. He was known in the area for chasing the smaller dinosaurs and stealing their cookies (how mean!), and lunch money. Rumor had it that Puppy had ventured into the area (for reasons we don’t know), and that the big dinosaur had eaten him and it was up to me to find out if this was true. “But what’s the dinosaur’s name?” I pleaded. “We need to know who we’re looking for?” Toluca’s face went a deathly white, and she had to sit down for a while (she momentarily mistook me for a chair as I’m so small – stupid draenei). As her mouth opened, she uttered a word that had sent a shiver down High Chief Stillpine’s lovely white fur when he’d mentioned it …..

Schwick

I raced back to see Modnahria. She is a very wise furbolg and would know what to do about Schwick. When I found her she was sitting on her favourite chair and writing down how many types of cookies she’d found on her recent travels. Eventually she had to put her book to one side as her drooling was smearing her very neat handwriting (which is difficult when you have such big furry paws).



Modnahria consults (and drools on) her cookie book


Modnahria welcomed me in and said I could help myself to the candyfloss that was next to her chair. I explained the dilemma to her and she sat thoughtfully for a minute or two. Unfortunately, I managed to get candyfloss stuck up my nose but I found if I sniffed hard enough it went down my throat – just like when you have a cold. I also noticed that Modnahria had some stuck on her eyebrows but she hadn’t realised. “How cute!,” I thought.


Modnahria and her candyfloss


“You must visit Schwick in Un’Goro and ask him if he’s eaten Puppy but it will be no easy task. You must take a bearded dwarf with you,” said Modnahria. I sat and wondered who on earth I could ask to help and then suddenly I remembered my new friend Sisif. Surely he would come to help a cute but naughty gnome. Modnahria explained that the toffee stuck in dwarves beards could act as a lure so Schwick would come out of hiding.

So off I went to Ironforge to find Sisif. I quickly went into Modnahria’s old house to have a wee and a cookie and found my Tranquil Mechanical Yeti practising his cookie stealing skills on Modnahria’s bear rug. How cute!


A cookie-stealing yeti! How nice!


Meanwhile, Smurfy said he was just going to visit my friend Lirn’s dress shop to see if there were any decent beards worth buying with his weekly allowance. He’d desperately wanted a beard for ages. I told him to meet me outside the Ironforge Auction House in ten minutes so we could find Sisif and then set off for Un’Goro as soon as possible.

Fortunately, as I approached the bridge I saw Sisif and my other good friend Hephestus. As I sneaked up behind them (and Yeti practised his cookie stealing skills on Hephestus) I heard them talking about the latest kills they’d done. Hephestus was telling Sisif how he’d kicked some orc in the shins and then when the orc had doubled over in pain, Heph had stolen his cookies and run off. Meanwhile, Sisif was explaining the benefit of sneezing to catch the enemy off guard. “A good sneeze, always blinds undeads, especially since the velocity of said sneeze is enough to rattle their bones.” Heph then mentioned how he’d seen a Wanted poster for a furbolg cookie stealer. At that point, I put my hands behind my back, whistled innocently, and said, “Must’ve been a bad Stillpine or Bristleback,” (it’s very difficult not to drool whilst whistling and speaking and looking innocent).



Hephestus and Sisif



“I must love you and leave you now,” said Heph, “I have important cheese fashions to attend to.” We both wished him well and I couldn’t help noticing how his bottom looked kinda cute in his pants. “Anyway, to more urgent business,” I thought to myself. I quickly explained to Sisif my predicament and why I desperately needed him to come and help. His normally cheery face turned sad and he gazed down at his beard. He immediately turned to me and saluted and said, “I’ve never met this Puppy before but I hear he is a good gnome. I will gladly come to help with Schwick.”



My yeti steals Heph's cookies


At this point Smurfy came back and I introduced him to Sisif. Smurfy could only stare at Sisif’s long and luscious beard and it took me a while to get Smurfy’s attention back. “But I so want a beard. They look so nice and cosy,” said Smurfy, “and all my friends have one.” I told Smurfy we had to do this important mission first and then we’d see about getting him a new beard. He seemed happy with that so off we all went to Un’Goro. Smurfy was particularly excited as he’d seen Jurassic Park with his friend Bellos (Amaranthine’s smurf) the other day.

Once we were in Un’Goro I wasn’t sure how Sisif would feel about me being a furbolg. So I quickly changed into one and I think he weed himself a bit as he thought I was a monster.



Sisif gets a bit worried


After he’d got over the initial shock we went for a quick swim in the local pool to freshen up for our meeting with Schwick. Smurfy was so excited about getting a new beard, he created a few ‘bubbles’ in the water, whilst Sisif pretended to be a shark and swam around under the water and made shark noises a lot.



Smurfy gets excited and Sisif pretends to be a shark


All of a sudden, the ground started to shake and the three of us stopped what we were doing. “That sounds like him, he’s sensed my toffee beard” said Sisif, “we should get going and find him.” We tumbled out of the pool and dried ourselves off and ran down the hill and bumped into the biggest dinosaur evah!



Schwick smells Sisif's toffee beard


A bit of wee escaped but I braced myself and prepared to fight the big beast. “Where’s Puppy??”, we shouted to Schwick. Schwick turned to look at us and I swear I saw him drool when he looked at me. “AHA!! ANOTHER SMALL TASTY GNOME MORSEL FOR ME TO EAT!,” he roared. I was so scared!! But I sighed with admiration as both Smurfy and Sisif raced towards Schwick and tried to save me. How brave!



I am saved! How brave!


I stood on my tiptoes and shouted at Schwick, “Did you eat my Puppy Poo?” “MUHAHAHAHAHA – YES I DID EAT PUPPY AND TO PROVE IT, I HAVE HIS INSIGNIA THAT I COUGHED UP,” boomed Schwick. I started to cry just a little as I saw the glinting insignia. “Quick Hala! Throw me one of your pigtail bands! I have a plan!” shouted Sisif. I threw him my spare pigtail band and Smurfy and Sisif took one end each and ran around and around Schwick in circles until Schwick dropped the insignia and crashed to the floor. “OUCH! I JUST CHIPPED A NAIL! THAT WASN’T NICE” boomed Schwick. I ran to pick up the insignia and realised that although it was a genuine Puppy Love insignia, it was one that he’d given away to a fan of his comics and he’d only ever had one made.



Puppy's token of appreciation


As Schwick lay there with an elastic band around his knees I breathed a sigh of relief. “Is it Puppy’s?” asked Smurfy, while Sisif checked Schwick’s teeth for cookies. “It isn’t,” I said. “But we should check his back end for signs of the poor Puppy look-a-like he’s obviously swallowed.”



We check Schwick's teeth for cookie crumbles



Waiting for the poor gnome. How sad.


We all wondered how long it would take for the poor unknown gnome to appear out of Schwick’s back end. After an hour or so, we came to the saddened conclusion that either the poor gnome had made his new gnome home in Schwick’s tummy, or he’d managed to escape in some dinosaur poo. We were hoping the latter was the case as we quickly trotted up to Fire Plume Ridge to take a quick sauna to relax. As we ran away, we heard Schwick sniffling and crying and promising never to eat another gnome ever again. Luckily my elastic bands don’t last very long so it wouldn’t be long before Schwick was on his way again.



Smurfy gets in trouble. My fault.


When we got to the sauna, poor Sisif’s beard came under intense scrutiny from Smurfy. I secretly thought Sisif’s beard was rather lush and could just about see the glinting toffees stuck inside it. I secretly touched Sisif’s beard and tried to grab a toffee but unfortunately poor Smurfy got the blame. “Stop touching my beard Smurfy, it’s not a toy!” exclaimed Sisif in a very frustrated manner. Poor Smurfy.


Poor Smurfy. But just look at those toffees!


We were all so relived that Schwick hadn’t eaten Puppy and we all sat and had a think about what we were to do next. We didn’t have another clue to follow and Azeroth and the Outlands are such big places. What was I to do? I sniffled a little and my nose dribbled too and suddenly I was sitting on a very hot floor crying my little eyes out with a hot bottom. Smurfy was shocked as he’d never seen me so upset and both him and Sisif immediately comforted me and told me that they would continue to help me find my Puppy Poo. As Sisif gave me a big hug and a piece of toffee from his beard, I swore to myself I’d never say anything mean about dwarves ever again.

Once I’d regained my composure, we all went back off to Ironforge to the local inn and had some Dwarven Ale, but not before going to my friend Lirn’s local shop to buy Smurfy a new beard because he’d been so brave and good.


Smurfy's new beard


After a few dwarven ales, we all made way back to our houses and to have a think about what we were going to do next. On my way home, I bumped into my friend Kyona. She is a very good furbolg friend of mine, and to cheer me up, she took me to the local funfair in Nagrand. “One of the goblins has a big bouncy trampoline, and if you can bounce high enough into the nest above, you get a nice prize,” she said. Although she did warn us that the goblin didn’t like furbolgs much.



Kyona keeping an eye on the furbolg hunter


Smurfy was very excited though as he watched Kyona and I jumping on the trampoline, so much so, that he wanted a go too, but was a bit scared to go on his own.



Kyona and I jumping at the Nagrand fairground.



Smurfy wanted a go!


As we were jumping, Kyona swore that she would listen out for any news of Puppy’s whereabouts. She was saddened to hear that he’d disappeared and that even though she’d never met him, she had heard he was a particularly handsome gnome. Kyona’s kind words warmed my heart, and, after giving her a big hug, I made my weary way home and fell asleep on the first table I found, and dreamed of Puppy and I playing together in some nice green fields.


Snoozling.


Maybe I could find some clues from other friends. Who knows? But when I woke up later I found a note in my pocket from a furbolg friend who is a master of disguise called Eitre. Maybe he could teach me some furbolg disguise tips for hiding and finding clues …..

To be continued ……

Part 3